incoherent thoughts that are overrunning my mind.

Okay so here's the deal. I've been having like major mood spurts here lately. I can go completely feminist to not really caring too much in about 5 seconds flat this week. It's crazy. I also have been thinking way more than i should, and if you know me than you know that that's a common problem. I have found myself going round and round in circles in my head and frankly I'm making myself dizzy. It's driving me insane. I don't know what the arrow will be pointing to when and if it finally stops spinning but I'm curious to find out.
I'm so sick of circles. Squares work so much better.
I can't even think straight enough to write a decent blog that makes sense. But then again if you know me, and considering the whole 5 people that read this blog regurely know me pretty well, then this blog will make perfect sense for the simple fact that you are already used to having to translate nearly everything i say into a coherent thought.

hey can i help it if there's this cute guy sitting across from me in the library at chipola?

My request

Okay so I have finally broken.
I'm so tired of hearing girls and women complain about guys who hurt them and then turn around and they still want to go back with them. I can't say that I am innocent of this but I am going to make a deffinate effort to change. I know women are strong and can change the world, but I also know that we can't do that if we don't stand up for ourselves. So make an effort. Walk away from that jerk who doesn't treat you right. And don't look back. Don't let some man control you and fight for yourself. Don't be a doormat and don't listen to anyone who says that your not good enough. We will never win the fight for equality if we're fighting as nothing but a doormat that wants to be swept off every so often. Be who you are and no one else. You deserve to be able to stand tall. Don't let anyone tell you that you don't.

Firemen

I have recently discovered that my life has been overrun by firemen. We are doing a play this week called "The Guys". It is based on a true story and takes place 10 days after September 11, 2001. It follows a journalist/editor who is recruited to help a New York City fire captain write the eulogies for 8 of his men that were lost forever in the World Trade Centers. The story is really moving and is the most serious play we have done thus far. Since the play opens Tuesday, we have all been going crazy getting ready for it. And just so you know, by all I mean the two actors in the play, the director, assistant director, stage manager, and me, the lighting technician. Now we have also added a spotlight controller and the projector controller. thats seven students and one teacher going crazy for one play that's about an hour and a half normally and about 2 hours including all the video. Not to mention that I have somehow nominated myself to do the PR for the play, which includes going around town asking complete strangers to hang up posters and writing letters to mail out to all the local firehouses (18 of them). It's alot of work, but also something that I have found out that I enjoy doing. I love being backstage. It's a lot of fun to see all the ins and outs of the play from every side.
Anyways, with all the talk about firemen with the play and reading a book by Nicholas Sparks called The Rescue which is about a firefighter, I have really started thinking about all the things that a firefighter does. It's kinda crazy to think that when everyone else is running away from the burning building, there are people that are running into willing to do whatever it takes to save lives and prevent excessive damage. These people are the ones that keep us safe and the ones that we know that we can count on no matter what. I always knew that they were heros. It was something that I've always accepted. But, until recently I never really thought about just how heroic these ordinary men doing extrodinary things really are. I'm so in awe of everything that they do right now.